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Some days, I feel exactly like this cat at the breakfast table—bewildered, overdressed, and entirely improbable. But also, this lucky cat deserves toast. Because considering life right now—between our Unfixed launch tomorrow and the last decade of living a very unfixed life myself with epilepsy—it’s a lot.
With this condition, in particular, when catastrophe hits, everyone tends to rush in to decide what’s “best” for you. And of course, you say, yes, because you’re thinking, “Well, I’ve really stepped in it this time, except with my face, and I'd better play the compliant patient here if there’s any way of remedying things—at all, ever.”
So, ten years ago, after my very big, horrible, no good seizure on the Upper West Side, my whole life changed—all of our books, shoes, photos, kid art, the vinyl heart of our home—all of it was boxed up and vanished into storage while I dealt with a dozen-plus surgeries and procedures, often in a one step forward, two back odyssey to be healed or “fixed”. In the middle of it all was the pandemic, two minor development deals, more seizures, and some absurd misadventures in family elder care.
This week, those ‘vanished’ boxes arrived back at my home in Cambridge. The first thing I unpacked was the old vinyl record player I’d given my youngest for Christmas years ago. I plugged it in, put on The Beatles’ Abbey Road, and braced for heartbreak.
The thing is, it worked. After all this time, the silly thing still plays. Every note and chord change of Here Comes the Sun washed over me like new light. All these years in exile from my life. And here it was.
The next item I pulled out stopped me cold—a pair of jodphurs from 1993. I owned JODPHURS??? Who on earth was I that made me think I needed these? I mean, I’ll be honest, I adore the balletic poetry of the equine, but I am a lousy rider. What absurd version of myself felt comfortable in these ridiculous things? Then, I remember! I got them before film school because I wanted to march (as a joke) around the set like a pioneering lady director. Oh, youth… What folly! I wondered if they still fit. Reader, just barely!
And I love that we probably paid a fortune to ship the multi-volume World Encyclopedia of Literature back from storage. That is very us. But the silly outfit was a version of myself I’d long forgotten. Tucked entirely away because the moment I’d found out I was going to become a parent in the years following NYU, I became the most terrified striver ever—studying all the baby and child development books, learning about attachment parenting, and slings! I would need to earn a lot of money for all the slings, diapers, and gear we would need. And education! Education had to be booked in utero. Everything had to be perfect as I was at peak self-loathing.
But gaaagh, I feel like so much of Gen X womanhood has been this secret club for people trying to return their souls for store credit. And not even Loehman’s would take back my tattered Rag and Bone essence. Never mind Bergdorf’s. And now—here we are— finally learning to honor all our former selves, one box, one chapter, one vinyl record at a time.
Someone who always seemed so completely at home in every version of herself was the inimitable Diane Keaton. Whether as Louise Bryant in Reds, J.C. Wiatt in Baby Boom, the unforgettable Annie Hall, or—perhaps most poignantly—the quintessential matriarch Sybil Stone in The Family Stone, she inhabited each of these selves with effortless grace. Oh, my queen.
The language used in the media over the weekend was not “Diane Passes,” but rather “Diane Dies,” the alliteration hammering home the profundity of the loss. She was such a role model to countless female comedians, actresses, and writers—so many incarnations of voices. To lose her feels impossible. A terrible mistake of the universe. Surely some other 79-year-old fascist would be a better choice? It’s simply unjust. This one needs a rewrite, Nancy.
Some Good Things
Perfect Nor’easter Cozy Essentials
“Genre-defying…” For readers of Dani Shapiro’s Inheritance and Delia Owens’ Where the Crawdads Sing,
’s memoir, Unfixed, reads like a perfect storm of a thriller. Preorder it and help us break the USA Today bestseller list.Emotional support baking Marian Burros’ original plum torte from the NY Times Cooking section, because… Hello? The world???
These LL Bean Chelsea galoshes, because you might need to run out for ice cream during the storm, and need your feet to look adorable while staying dry.
Doesn’t this little plaid-check ensemble feel so Nancy Drew autumnal? So girly Sherlock??? You might need it to solve a Halloween mystery. Just saying.
Now THIS is what you wear to stay cozy at The Head of the Charles to cheer on your favorite students in the race! The red beanie makes it!
And if you feel the need to smell like a warm biscuit this year, Jo Malone has you covered. This citrus, ginger, vanilla scent is just the ticket.
I love old school point-and-shoot film cameras, and when I saw this, I had to have it for everyday snaps of fall life around Cambridge. It puts the intentionality back into the act of image-making.
Back when I worked for Martha, she despised scented candles, but then I went and lived in France around the corner from a Dyptique store, and I’m sorry, but this pumpkin candle is hella delicious!
Ever since my delightful chat with
, many of you have been asking where I get my “work pajamas”. I am super old school. They’re from J.Crew. If I spill coffee on them (as I often do), OxyClean gets them back to whiter than white with no effort at all. I’m basic that way.MORE emotional support baking, because how can you not? This skillet apple crisp heals so much news cycle trauma.
The Unfixed Playlist
The music that made
’s miraculous memoir… perfect for today’s stormy sentiments.And then, a marvelous vintage autumnal jazz list to cook by is key…
And now, a little science…
Magical Broken Face Glue! (Made from my favorite food!)
Somewhere in China, a team of brilliant researchers has invented a new medical adhesive called “Bone-02.” Inspired by oysters—because, of course, the universe’s answer to our broken bones would come from a mollusk—it can heal fractures without metal, in minutes.
Finally, science that gets me. THIS is what I needed!
Meanwhile, instead of sending troops into peaceful cities to battle inflatable frogs, maybe we should be funding innovations like this. Because that—right there—is what progress looks like. China isn’t just eating our lunch. They’re plating it beautifully, pairing it with a chilled Montrachet, and finishing with crème brûlée.
A Dopamine Hit: Tell Me You Do Not NEED These Halloween Costumes!
Richard E. Grant always lights up a room! Especially as a pair of Sconces. And the others celebrating the launch of Jane Asher’s new fabric collection are also quite amazing if you lust for textiles as I do.
Ok, that’s what I’ve got. Next time, I’ll be reporting from the Unfixed tour. And if you can join us tomorrow to pop the champagne, we’re going to try a little experiment and invite you LIVE to her pub day* launch party on October 14th. We’ll begin festivities at 5:15 pm PT/8:15 pm ET with a warm intro from Kimberly’s big brother, Eric, aka Sasquatch, followed by Kim reading an excerpt from Unfixed. Family, friends, and colleagues will be there in person, but it won’t be the same without you. So let’s give this a try! Nothing that a phone and a little tripod wrangling can’t handle.
Yours in loads of acid-free craft glue and book plates - xoxo - gotham girl
PS - I am a human typo. Amnesty appreciated.
*Existential cat courtesy of
and Beata Heuman!
Diane was an original. All the celebs I grew up with are departing. Every time, it feels like a piece of my childhood is disappearing into history.
"Diane Dies." Isn't it fascinating to realize how death-avoidant we are? And when we do choose to face it head-on, it feels like a slap in the face? Damn, it hurts.